At best they just try to include you in the community, and at worst you are constantly told that you'll be welcome "when you're ready. He totally blew me off and said "blah blah blah" and it was so early in our relationship that I was taken aback and didn't push the issue then and there.
I hate that it's all on his terms. I know how long his residency lasts. He is a resident now, and I am a professor The problem is that we could not find a geographic location that could accommodate both of us, and this is a second year that we live apart, in two different states.